23 National Nightmares We’ve Already Overcome

Courtesy: Fox.

#10: Glee After Season 3

I know this is a matter of opinion, but here’s the thing: no it is not. The first few seasons of this show were incredible. The music was exciting, the stories that we never get to see on TV were told unapologetically, the characters were relatable and became heroes for young people who’d, til then, been told they were outsiders. It was all around a rousing success, and all the emotions were felt all of the time. But then things started to get out of control. Ryan Murphy was, maybe, planning out his next moves using just a giant Mad Libs pad and a list of outrageous (though impressive) guest stars. Full disclosure: I did not finish the series. I couldn’t. It became too much for me, a person who has thus far called Rosie O’Donnell our country’s greatest treasure and has lauded Crossroads as its greatest contribution to film.  But the following is a list of things I know (or believe cuz of what I’ve heard or read) to be true about what came of the series:

-Everyone got married. Those two lesbian cheerleaders. Those two cute boys who sang Katy Perry in sweatervests that time. Maybe the teachers? Unclear.

-Coach Beiste, once a symbol for total self-acceptance as a woman comfortable in and proud of her (typically) masculine attributes, transitioned from female to male.

-Those kids all moved to New York City, but still somehow managed to 1) stay friends and 2) do lots of things with their Ohio high school’s chorus.

-With no cast left because everyone left for New York, a whole new slew of teens were brought in to McKinley High to replace the 30-year-old teens we’d been watching this whole time.

-Rachel Berry won a Tony. Let me repeat: Rachel Berry. Gets herself. A TONY AWARD. I am willing to accept every second of everything I’ve ever seen on all 10 seasons ofThe X-Files, but I draw the line here. LINE. DRAWN.