RuPaul’s Drag Race review: Witches of Beast-wick

It’s time for a ball, henny! This week’s RuPaul’s Drag Race had the queens getting ooky spooky and taking it to the runway in witch eleganza.

I love a quick drag challenge as much as the next person, but we’re five episodes into this season of RuPaul’s Drag Race and almost every single mini challenge has involved the queens getting into quick drag. We get the point.

The mini challenge this week was fun, and I always love a wild Trixie Mattel sighting, but let’s focus on the main challenge: The Monster Ball.

No, this ball isn’t inspired by Lady Gaga’s world tour circa 2009-2011 — though that would be amazing — but is instead the opportunity for the queens to show off their versatility and their talent when it comes to pulling a look. They had three categories: Trampy Trick-or-Treater, which is pretty self-explanatory; Witch Please, a witch-inspired outfit; and MILF Eleganza, which stands for Monster I’d Like to Freak. This means the queens had a chance to do sexy, a chance to do campy, and a chance to do spooky. Some of the queens struggled with that, so let’s break this down, category by category.

Category Is… Trampy Trick-or-Treater

Everybody has seen Mean Girls — and if you haven’t, please close this review right now and go watch it — and that movie taught us that in girl world, Halloween is the one day a girl can dress however sexily she likes and get away with it. All they have to do is put on lingerie and a pair of animal ears and call it a day. Well, the same can be said for gay world, and especially for drag queens. The contestants basically got free rein with this category, and some of them missed the mark.

A’Keria came out as a casino card dealer and the costume was different and sexy. It was very retro, and she even says that everyone always goes sexy nurse, so she wanted to stand out. I don’t usually love her looks, but this was a good one. And Miss Vanjie…wow. She went full blown Victoria’s Secret Angel and it’s probably the best she ever looked. Her paint, body, hair, outfit, wings, everything was on point — and it wasn’t red or orange!

Obviously Plastique killed this category, because she is a stunning biological woman. Vintage Playboy Bunny is pretty overdone, but she looked SO good that nobody cares. Honestly, how is she real? Scarlet, however, looked a mess. What is she supposed to be? How is that a pirate? And Nina, even though I love Little Shop of Horrors, Audrey II isn’t sexy. It doesn’t surprise me that she went campy, because she always does, but I want to see something different from her.

Ra’jah’s cat look was nothing impressive, but she looked great, definitely a step up from last week. I 100% did not understand Shuga’s costume, though. She said she’s a troll doll, but she looked nothing like a troll doll. Brooke Lynn’s mummy look almost seemed pretty basic, until you looked down and realize she was walking en pointe the entire runway! These are the details that make or break a look!

Last but not least, we have Ariel and Yvie. Ariel put a new spin on a naughty nurse, making it more Silent Hill and toning down the sexiness. There were some issues with the dress, as Michelle pointed out, but the concept was fun and different. I think we all had high expectations for Yvie this week, and her first look killed on the runway. She wore a children’s dinosaur costume, she made it funny, she made it a little sexy, and she made it fashion! Oh, and Silky was a unicorn. It was not good.

Category Is… Witch Please!

To be honest, I was a bit disappointed with this category. So many of the outfits looked so similar. Most of the girls just went with long black dresses, which is the most basic interpretation of a “witch” theme. It was basically just Maleficent after Maleficent. They all looked good, but come on. Scarlet at least did something different with her swampy “Fire Island Witch” idea, and she wasn’t afraid to get ugly.

Once again, Nina went campy and dressed as a Salem witch being burned at the stake. I really like the concept, but she needed some help with the … execution (get it?). The flames on the bottom of the dress looked more Guy Fieri and cheapened it for me.

Ra’jah went for an Oz-inspired look, which is a unique interpretation, but it just doesn’t feel witchy to me at all. The same can be said for Silky, who was inspired by The Wiz, but she didn’t look evil enough to pull it off. Like Michelle said, she just kind of looked like Oprah again. The worst part is Silky defended herself by saying she can only paint one kind of face. Girl, this is a competition, you shouldn’t say that out loud.

Brooke Lynn was inspired by Enchantress, which was perfect considering Cara Delevingne was the guest judge and played the character in Suicide Squad. This look was the right amount of dark, but still stood out from the other parade of black dresses. Shuga’s interpretation was interesting: she said she was Bloody Mary and coated herself in blood and flesh.

Category Is… MILF Eleganza!

A’keria’s spider look was far too similar to her witch look. Vanjie’s zombie look was fun, but not a showstopper. Plastique really killed her MILF look as a sexy skeleton. She managed to get glamour in there, but also have that spook factor with the makeup. She’s showing that she can do more than just “pretty” — but she still ends up looking pretty good. I was worried about Scarlet’s look in the work room, but she pulled it together and I’m actually impressed by her Creature From The Black Lagoon-inspired costume.

Nina didn’t go full camp this time, and I really liked the execution of the wax face mask, but her dress really didn’t wow me. I think the most confusing of all the looks was Ariel. She said she was Little Mermaid meets Tinker Bell from Jersey? That’s just her drag aesthetic all the time; that’s not a monster! The judges seemed to really like Yvie’s look, and I do give her points for going a little gore and a little more “ugly,” but I thought she’d bring a lot more for this challenge.

Overall, some looks really wowed me this week, but I don’t think this ball is going to go down in RuPaul’s Drag Race herstory. I think I’m most disappointed with Yvie, who is known for being an odd queen, hence her name, and I thought she would pull off something major. The judges liked her, she was safe, but I still wanted more.

Ariel being in the bottom was the only possible answer. Her first two looks were fine, but that “monster” getup was far from ghoulish. I really like Shuga, and I do think she has more to show us in the competition, but she didn’t impress me or the judges. However, Silky probably deserved to be in the bottom more than her. All three of her looks were forgettable. I literally can’t remember what they were, and I just finished the episode.

But in a kinda lackluster lip sync, Ariel and Shuga went head to head. I would’ve fallen asleep, but then drama: Ariel slipped on her own train and fell HARD! When I tell you the entire room of people I was watching with gasped out loud, I am not exaggerating. I can only imagine how she felt in that moment, but she had to go home.

Like I said, I feel like Shuga has more to show us, but Ariel, on the other hand, kept giving us the same thing, so good riddance!

Random Ruflections

• Ra’jah realizes she was in the bottom, right? Where does she get off making fun of Yvie?
• “Backwoods Barbie” Trixie Mattel: an icon.
• “So I have to ask, what makes you think RuPaul’s best friend is a crash test dummy?” – Trixie
• I don’t think Ra’jah should’ve won that mini challenge.
• Can Ru stop trying to make “lerk” a thing?
• I’m glad it’s a sewing challenge and not another acting challenge.
• Ariel, go back to Party City where you belong!
• “Have you ever seen the Witches of Beast-wick?”
• “You’ve heard of Monet X Change. This is her cousin, Needles X Change.” – Ru about Ariel
• Can Elvira always be a judge?
• Brooke Lynn won again! Go Canada!