Game of Thrones season 7 finale recap: The Dragon and the Wolf

Tonight’s “The Dragon and the Wolf” help set up the final season of Game of Thrones. Read about everything you missed with our Game of Thrones season 7 finale recap.

Fair warning: There are a lot of moving parts in this episode, so let’s walk through them as best as we can.

The Unsullied are ready (and probably still pissed about Casterly Rock). With cold stares to boot, they stand outside the castle walls as Bronn and the Lannister soldiers prepare for a war, if one breaks out, of course. It’s meant to be an armistice, but who knows. Jaime’s there, too. But he’s all pensive and talking about spending his gold on “family” and whatnot, but he stops being moody when the Dothraki arrive.

On the water, Jon, Tyrion and Davos sail past the (Euron) Greyjoy fleet on their way to the Dragon Pit. Below deck, the Hound decides to go check on the captured Wight. Despite being in a box, it still has plenty of fight in it. Once they make it to land, they meet up with Bronn, Podrick and Brienne, too. When she sees the Hound, she tells him that Arya is still alive. The news seems to please him, but I’m too distracted by the fact that they’re both the same height and it’s awesome. Bronn and his old pal, Tyrion, talk about how they used to be bros and blah, blah, blah. Nothing really comes out of it besides confirmation that Bronn’s only really looking out for himself.

As Cersei prepares to join the party, she tells the Mountain that “if anything goes wrong,” Dany dies first, then Tyrion and Jon Snow.

Crazy, party of five? Your table at the Dragon Pit is ready

At the Dragon pit, Team Tyrion (compromised of Jon, the Hound, Theon Greyjoy and Brienne) arrive first. Before Cersei arrives, the Hound asks if he’s going to die in King’s Landing because of a Lannister, but Tyrion points out that each side has a Clegane that is either going to help or harm the results. Cersei arrives on time, but shows her displeasure that Dany decided to make them wait on her.

But you know, when you have dragons, big entrances are a must. Plus, they only wait like a few minutes before Drogon comes in and drops her off. Personally, I thought it was a little extra, but again, dragons. Though, she does apologize.

Tyrion tries to get the ball rolling, but Euron opens his big mouth and starts to cause a ruckus. Cersei tells him to “sit down or leave,” so they can talk and get it over with. While Cersei and Tyrion agree that there will never be harmony, Jon Snow says that there won’t be any harmony if everyone’s dead. Cersei, being reasonably strategic, asks why on earth she’d pull her armies back for some mysterious threat in the North?

Enter the Hound and his pet. We’ll call him Frank from now on.

At first, Frank doesn’t want to come out of his box. The Hound kicks the box over and Frank goes straight for Cersei. For once in their lives, everyone is being perfectly smart. They keep Frank on a leash and remain armed and ready.

Jon demonstrates the two ways to kill Frank, and Cersei appears to be visibly shaken. Jaime feels the same way when he hears that there are at least a hundred thousand out there. However, the biggest baby in the entire pit is Euron, who says that he’ll be on the Iron Islands waiting it all out.

Afterward, Cersei agrees to a truce, as long as Jon Snow agrees to the same. As Ned Stark’s son, she knows he will be true to his word. But Jon explains that he can’t draw a truce and remain technically serving under House Lannister because he already pledged loyalty to Dany. So, Cersei checks out of the conversation and leaves.

I don’t know if anyone is keeping count, but this has to be the millionth time Jon Snow’s honor completely screwed everyone. They were so close.

With nothing left to do, Tyrion offers to go talk to Cersei on his own.

Tyrion talks to the “most murderous woman”

Before Tyrion meets with Cersei, Jaime admits that he did try to talk to his sister, but didn’t get very far. Tyrion and Jaime say goodbye, in case Cersei does kill him, and he enters the lion’s den.

Cersei lays in with her accusations as soon as Tyrion’s close enough. She claims that Tywin’s death left the Lannisters too vulnerable, but when Tyrion suggests she kill him right now, Cersei doesn’t say anything. Once again, she’s being perfectly reasonable. So for any Cersei fans, this must be your night.

In their mutual hatred, Tyrion says he loved his niece and nephew. Though Cersei shows little concern for the past and more about the future. The big picture now is protecting her baby.

Daenerys and Jon

Jon knows he screwed up, but Dany forgives him slightly and tries to focus on something else — like babies. After she reminds Jon that she can’t have children, Jon wonders if that’s really true. Basically, it sounds like he wants to try it out and see what happens.

Before the conversation gets any weirder, Tyrion returns … with Cersei, who agrees to fight in the North.

In the North

When Sansa learns that Jon bent the knee to Dany, she becomes very frustrated. As she contemplates what that means for them, she asks Littlefinger for counsel on the whole Arya situation. He spells out Arya’s endgame and how she may try to kill Sansa to become Lady of Winterfell.

At his insistence, Sansa calls Arya into the Great Hall and holds court. It looks like she’s about to accuse her sister of murder and treason, but Sansa turns on Littlefinger instead. With every House in the North there to witness, Sansa admits she’s a slow learner, but unravels Littlefinger’s plan from the very beginning. To avenge her mother and Aunt Lysa, Sansa reminds Littlefinger of what he’s done. As he begs for mercy and cries, Arya slits his throat.

Afterward, Sansa and Arya finally make peace.

Meanwhile, Bran and Samwell reunite. (Scroll down for that wack conversation.)

Back at Dragonstone

I know — why did they pigeonhole a stop at Dragonstone when Dany and Jon could’ve sailed straight for White Harbor? I don’t know.

Maybe because they wanted a really dramatic backdrop for Theon and Jon’s conversation about regrets and whatnot. Bleeding Heart Jon forgives Theon and explains that Theon can be a Greyjoy and still carry Ned Stark’s memory with him.

With some sort of renewed sense of confidence, Theon tells the remaining “good” Greyjoys that they must go look for Yara. When a fight breaks out, Theon manages to win and gets the boats ready to go.

Cersei’s real plan

Instead of bailing and returning to the Iron Islands, Cersei and Euron planned for him to take his fleet to Essos to ferry back 20,000 men for the war. Apparently, Cersei doesn’t really have any intention of going North to help fight the dead. She’s going to let all the “monsters” duke it out, and then, she’s going to rule.

Jaime argues against her plan since he made a legitimate promise. And he intends to keep that promise, with or without Cersei. In fact, he’s really pissed about Cersei’s plan and she’s extra pissed that he’s willing to walk away from her. She lets the Mountain draw his sword, but also lets Jaime leave.

Aegon Targaryen

When Sam and Bran talk, Bran reveals that Jon would technically be a Dornish bastard and not the son of Ned Stark. But with the information Gilly revealed, Sam corrects Bran’s theory and asks him to go “see” the wedding between Rhaegar and Lyanna. Since they were legitimately married, Jon is technically the true heir to the Iron Throne (Yeah, I know we know this already, but it’s officially TV canon now).

Also, his real name is Aegon.

And Aegon totally did it with his aunt, Daenerys, in this episode. So that’s a thing. She’s probably going to become pregnant after this, too. It’s gross and weird to watch.

So that’s that.

But wait! There’s still more.

You remember how the Night King took out Viserion? Well, it looks like Viserion 2.0 is packing more heat than both his former brothers combined. He takes out the Wall like it’s nothing and the dead cross over.

Next: Game of Thrones season 7 soundtrack

Does it bother anyone else that Viserion’s wings have holes in them? Technically, he shouldn’t be able to fly if they’re starting to rot out.

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