25 TV tropes you’ll definitely recognize but are super tired of seeing

A super easy breakup and amicable exes

I can’t speak for every person who’s ever broken up with someone, but I’d venture a guess that this one exists solely in the world of fiction. Breakups, by their very nature are messy, emotional, and devastating. The idea that two people who loved each other can shake hands and move on without any screaming, name calling, or plate throwing is just not a reality.

I’m sure somewhere out there exes can part ways in an adult, mature manner, but I haven’t encountered these unicorns. In all my thirty-something years on this planet, I’ve never had to sit with a girlfriend while she calmly and rationally chatted about the breakup she’s going through.

In fact, I’ve had to talk plenty of them out of getting bangs, pry their phones from their hands so they’ll stop stalking his Instagram, and run to the store for wine and ice cream. This amicable breakup stuff isn’t real. It’s just another lie that television tells us to make us feel bad about being trainwrecks in our own lives.

And don’t even think about those couples who are friends immediately friends after they break up. How is that even possible? I’ve cried until I was dehydrated and called the bum every name in the book, but it’s never occurred to me to go for drinks after getting dumped. How could you sit across from the person who just broke your heart? It’s not real, folks.

Examples: How I Met Your Mother, Cougar Town, The New Adventures of Old Christine, Friends, and The Big Bang Theory