5 Decadent Sweets to Overwhelm Your Easter Sweet Tooth

A basket of Easter eggs decorations is on display at Easter Freyung market 10 days before Easter celebrations in Vienna, Austria on April 04, 2017. / AFP PHOTO / JOE KLAMAR (Photo credit should read JOE KLAMAR/AFP/Getty Images)

Forget the milk ball eggs and the chocolate bunnies. These five Easter sweets are so chock full of sugar you won’t sleep until the 4th of July.

Every year, it’s a contest to see what giant marshmallow Peep or which Cadbury Creme Egg will take the carrot cake for most absurd Easter dessert. Maybe you, like me, prefer to eat like two malted milk ball eggs and then walk away holding your stomach, but apparently, some folks in the world prefer to consume an entire beer glass of pure sugar and come back for seconds. Teeth sensitivity ensures that I can’t relate to those people, but I salute them for their accomplishments.

Instead, I will sit back and gaze with a mixture of longing and horror at the levels to which chefs and candy manufacturers have gone in April of 2017 to create the most ridiculous Easter desserts possible that human beings can actually purchase and consume. And let me tell you, this year has some doozies. Brace yourselves, folks, because here are five winning food items that earn golden eggs as the most absurdly decadent Easter desserts. Consume at your own risk.

Deep Fried Creme Eggs

First up: what could possibly make an average Cadbury Creme Egg even more ridiculous than it already is? Deep frying it, of course! Simpson’s Fish & Chips, a fish and chip place in Cheltenham, England, decided this was an egg-celent idea and has been serving these puppies for a few weeks now. Apparently, they’re amazing. The idea is that they warm the egg inside lightly as they fry the outer batter, ensuring that the egg remains firm as it warms. Okay…I’m tempted.

You’ve gotta give Simpson’s credit, though. Apparently, their fish and chip shop is doing amazing work to help protect the environment. They recycle all card and glass that they use, and they’re currently working to install solar panels to power their shop. They also are highly supportive of free range chicken farmers in England.

It’s probably a bit too much of a stretch to assume we have readers close enough to Cheltenham to try this crazy egg, but if somehow someone magically does, let us know if it’s more or less ridiculous than your average egg. I’m not sure how the Simpson’s folks managed to make this egg look like a posh dessert, but kudos to them for succeeding.