Chris Craziness: March Madness Round of 64 – Chris Kirkpatrick vs. Chris Johnson


For our next set of Chris craziness, we go back to the glory days of *NSYNC and call upon a former Arizona running back who is now a free agent.

In honor of March Madness, we’ve put together a different sort of bracket. Instead of college basketball and watching the undeserved rise of Northwestern, we plucked 64 Chrises from the universe and dropped them into a steaming bowl of Culturess craziness, in what we consider a battle to the death, not unlike Game of Thrones. Only one Chris can reign. And as we unroll all the greatest contenders from the world of entertainment, sports and pop cultures, it’s up to you to decide who wins and who loses.

Round 1:

Chris Kirkpatrick (from *NSYNC)

*NSYNC was the first and last boy band that really mattered. Anyone who thinks otherwise may see themselves out of this conversation. As one of the founding members of the group, Chris Kirkpatrick deserves a special place in the boy band hall of fame. Before there were any directions or any Jonases, Chris Kirkpatrick and the *NSYNC crew ushered in the new millennium in the most memorable way possible — with second-rate dance moves and harmonious lyrics about getting the girl. Once *NSYNC broke up, Kirkpatrick kept himself busy by voicing the character of Chip Skylark on The Fairly Oddparents. So, thank you, Chris, for giving us the earworm, “My Shiny Teeth and Me.”


Dec 4, 2016; Glendale, AZ, USA; Arizona Cardinals injured running back Chris Johnson against the Washington Redskins at University of Phoenix Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports

Chris Johnson (NFL Player)

Look, the NFL’s really competitive. That’s not news. But Chris Johnson was a first round draft, won the rushing title in his second year, and was the NFL’s offensive player of the year. So not only is he a tremendous athlete, but in a league full of tremendous athletes, Chris Johnson stood above them all. Currently, Chris Johnson is a free agent. And as soon as he’s in tip-top shape, you can bet that he’ll be back to making running the length of a football field look easy. Possibly as the reigning king of Culturess’ Chris craziness.

That is if you get out there and vote!

Now vote!

Next: Chris Craziness: March Madness Culturess-Style

Which Chris is the most worthy? Let us know by voting and may the best Chris win!