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The Culturess Drinking Game for Super Bowl 51: Patriots vs. Falcons

By Cheryl Wassenaar

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The biggest football game is upon us, and with it comes our very own drinking game for Super Bowl 51 — with Patriots and Falcons rules.

We’ve made it. After all the build up about who would perform the halftime show, what commercials would air, and who would even play in the actual game, we’ve made it to Super Bowl Sunday. Tonight, the New England Patriots and the Atlanta Falcons will play in Houston, Texas, for the right to call themselves the NFL champions for the 2016-17 season.

You may have an interest in watching for one particular team. On the other hand, you may want to watch just for the commercials. After all, they’ve cost at least $5 million each, according to Variety.

Since this is a no-judgment zone, we’ve come up with three different sets of rules to play a superb Super Bowl drinking game. You can cherrypick from each set, follow one exclusively, or even add in a few of our overtime rules.

The Falcons Rules

  • Take a drink for every field goal and touchdown.
    • Toast the TV if someone does a ridiculous touchdown celebration.
    • Finish your drink if it’s Julio Jones and he manages to get off a TD dance.
  • Finish your drink if the Falcons score a safety or intercept Tom Brady.
  • Drink every time Matt Ryan is referred to as “Matty Ice”, which is his actual nickname.
  • Start chugging if the commentators bring up the Falcons’ woes in reaching the Super Bowl. (For bonus points, hum “The Force Theme” while you do it, since the Falcons are kind of the heroes in the narrative so far.)
  • Finish your drink, then do your best version of Julio Jones’ touchdown dance if the Falcons win the game.

The Patriots Rules

  • Take a drink for every field goal and touchdown.
    • Toast the TV if someone does a ridiculous touchdown celebration.
    • Finish your drink if someone does the Gronk Spike, since he is not actually playing the game.
  • Finish your drink if the Pats score a safety or intercept Matt Ryan.
  • Drink every time the cameras cut to Bill Belichick and he has the same expression on his face as he usually does. You know the one.
  • Start chugging every time the commentators bring up the Patriots’ long history of controversy during the Belichick-Brady era. (For bonus points, hum “The Imperial March” while you do it.)
  • Finish your drink and spike the container (if safe and possible) in honor of Rob Gronkowski if the Pats win the game.

The Commercial Rules

  • Take a drink if you’ve seen the commercial currently playing already.
  • Take a drink if the commercial actually refers to the product it’s selling.
  • Finish your drink and pour another if you feel disturbed after a commercial finishes.
  • Start chugging when a celebrity shows up in any commercial.
  • Take a drink if you actually find the commercial funny or memorable.
  • Pour another round if the game goes to overtime.

The Overtime Rules

  • Take a drink if your team wins the coin toss.
    • Finish it if they lose.
  • Drink if you notice a quality drop in commercials during overtime.
  • Finish your drink if the game ends on a touchdown in overtime.

Next: The Super Bowl's Leaked Ads

Remember: please drink responsibly, and enjoy the Super Bowl!

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