With One Down, Here Are Donald Trump’s Other Six Horcruxes
WASHINGTON, USA – October 26: Ivanka Trump speaks as her father, Republican Presidential Candidate Donald Trump, stands with her on stage during the opening ceremony for the Trump International Hotel, Old Post Office, in Washington, USA on October 26, 2016. (Photo by Samuel Corum/Anadolu Agency/Getty Images)
Ivanka
His Nagini. The confidante that follows Trump’s every move and the daughter that we’re 99% sure he’s slept with, Ivanka. She is the easiest to kill, but the hardest to prove. Here’s the thing about Ivanka that everyone knows: She is no dumby.
Ivanka Trump owns multiple companies and is a better busniessman than her father will ever be. And there is absolutely no way she wasn’t offended by the comments against women that Donald made. So while she plays the role of doting daughter, we all know who she’s really going to vote for.
And so, for Ivanka, the way to break the final horcrux is to prove who she voted for. Capture the moment when she goes in and votes for Hillary Clinton and Trump with evaporate in a cloud of cheeto dust to never return again.
We could say that this was all one big joke and that he is not, in fact, Voldemort but let’s not lie to ourselves. He’s Voldemort. Actually, wait, that is a lie. He’s worse.
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So on November 8th, be the Harry Potter you’ve always wanted to be and defeat the Dark Lord. Go out and vote and make a change in this world.