No one owes you their coming out, not even famous authors

Following a Medium post where Simon-verse author Becky Albertalli came out as bi, there have been numerous discussions over who gets to tell LGBTQ stories.

If you inhabit Book Twitter, you have likely witnessed a lot of Discourse over the last 48 hours regarding Becky Albertalli and who has the authority to tell queer stories and when. In order to fully understand the scope of the issue, we need to go back in time just a bit.

For those unaware, in 2015, Albertalli wrote the popular young adult novel Simon vs. the Homosapien Agenda, which preceded the film adaptation, Love, Simon in 2018. Albertalli has since written two sequels and a novella, and Love, Simon propelled the recent Hulu spin-off Love, Victor.

Albertalli is far from being the only author to write young adult stories about LGBTQ kids, but her books are some of the most famous out there. Of course, where there’s smoke, there’s fire. With fame comes scrutiny, in particular, due to her seemingly straight marriage to her husband.

Many queer people have raised the question of whether a straight woman should write stories about LGBTQ kids. While this is a fair topic to debate and pose, Albertalli recently issued a public statement regarding her sexuality in response to the ongoing intense discussions about her identity.

In an August 31 Medium post, Albertalli detailed her personal struggles with identity and queerness as they intersected with her rising growth as a public figure. The entire post is worth reading in full as shei describes her inspirations for her novels and how they intersect with her lived experiences.

Albertalli details the scrutiny over her identity she’s faced in connection with her works, which essentially boils down to identity policing. Albertalli is married to a man which some readers/fans have taken umbrage with:  why would a “straight” woman write an LGBTQ story? Was it just a money grab or an attempt to appropriate queer culture?

Before eventually confirming and coming out as bi toward the end of the post, Albertalli speaks to this anxiety:

"“Imagine hundreds of people claiming to know every nuance of your sexuality just from reading your novels. Imagine trying to make space for your own uncertainty. Imagine if you had a Greek chorus of internet strangers propping up your imposter syndrome at every stage of the process.”"

Despite the success of Albertalli’s works, LGBTQ books are no guaranteed path to money and success. To assume that an author would write about gay boys kissing to make money is presuming not just motive, but is also factually inaccurate based on the way the market works.

Beyond the scope of publishing as a market, though, the scrutiny Albertalli has faced over her identity has raised a lot of questions and conversations about #ownvoices within publishing.

This was furthered when author and comedian Gaby Dunn started a viral thread on Wednesday essentially stating that people shouldn’t write about queer content until they are ready for the public scrutiny that comes along with it.

Dunn’s original tweet stated, “I sort of think you shouldn’t write/create queer media and then feel weird when people ask if you’re queer??” Later in the thread, Dunn hinted at Albertalli’s Medium piece before explicitly naming her.

Dunn’s thread launched a flurry of tweets and Twitter Discourse, leading Albertalli to an impromptu Instagram Live on Thursday afternoon. Though she didn’t save the live to her Instagram, Albertalli’s post announcing it states that she was “feeling really desperate to be seen as a person right now…”

In order to fully dissect this, I have to disclose something personal about myself I’ve never written about publicly before. I identify as bisexual/queer, but I didn’t come to terms with those labels until I was 26, almost 27.

Much of the conversation initiated by Dunn seems to assume that people are born knowing everything about themselves, able to fully and confidently ingratiate themselves with the queer community.

While the popular notion that LGBTQ people know who they are from a very young age is true for many queer people, it is not true for all queer people, especially those from isolated, rural, or conservative backgrounds.

In her essay, Albertalli states that she didn’t meet an openly bi person until she was in college which impacted her knowledge and perception of bisexuality. Similarly, I was never able to conceive of myself as bisexual, despite questioning thoughts for years, due to lack of exposure to other bi people.

This didn’t prevent me from caring about the LGBTQ community or engaging with them. I certainly tried to incorporate queer themes and characters into my writing before I came out. But according to Dunn, I never should have had that opportunity to begin with, which is completely baffling.

How was I, someone who was so cut off I didn’t even realize I was closeted, supposed to not write about and explore something within myself until I was “comfortable being part of it?”

This kind of queer gatekeeping and identity policing is so dangerous. The real-world implications of this impose a forced removal of the closet. Dunn’s argument assumes that anyone who wants to write about queer issues should be out before they do so.

But there are many LGBTQ people who don’t live in Los Angeles or New York City, and in fact in the deep South, where life is much harder for those who are Othered, including Albertalli herself who still lives in Georgia, and are unable to leave due to financial or other reasons.

Up until three months ago, it was still legal to be fired on the basis of sexual orientation in this country. And yet, no one should write about themselves, their own personhood, unless they are willing to risk their own livelihood, and likely bodily harm, by coming out?

Thankfully, many authors have rallied around Albertalli, not just to protect her coming out, which she did not want to do this way, but to protect current and future LGBTQ writers who may or may not still be in the closet from being discouraged or feeling unsafe.

Albertalli herself has called for an end to the discussions as well, not just for her own sanity, but for the wellbeing of the queer community as a whole.

Hopefully, the conversations surrounding Albertalli’s essay will lead to greater change and conversations within the publishing industry and book community, including how to better protect queer authors who are most at risk.

What do you think about Becky Albertalli’s Medium essay? Tell us in the comments below!