DC’s Legends of Tomorrow season 5 episode 9 review: #Zonstantine?

Zari and Constantine take an accidental detour and run into some high-profile faces in Legends of Tomorrow’s “The Great British Fake Off”

After Behrad’s shocking (and tear-jerking) death in last week’s episode “Zari, Not Zari,” the tensions of Legends of Tomorrow are at an all-time high. Constantine’s tangled up with Astra, Zari wants her brother back, Charlie suspects Sara has an ability she’s not telling anyone about, Nate is in love with a woman who doesn’t exist, heck – even Mick Rory has his own drama to deal with.

With such high stakes on all sides, “The Great British Fake Off” should’ve been a tense, fast-paced, episode, but somehow ends up lacking the urgency (and the agency) that should’ve been implicit at this point in both the story and the season.

In an attempt to locate the last piece of the loom (which we find out, via flashback, was hidden by Charlie’s friend the enchantress), Constantine casts a spell, but it goes wrong when Sara collapses. At the same time, Zari and Constantine are sent back to a boarding house in the 1910s, where they quickly find themselves among the worst villains that history has to offer. Meanwhile, in the present, Ava (worried about Sara and unsure of her next move) convinces Gary to portal her to hell so that she can get the last piece of the loom from Astra.

On the brighter side of things, the Zari/Constantine plot is undeniably fun. The show made the right call (yet again) by giving two of its most interesting characters the ‘A’ storyline, and the unlikely matchup also provides Tala Ashe and Matt Ryan some time to put their chemistry on display, which we’ve had little time to see up until this point. It’s an interesting dynamic between the two of them, and one that’s gone previously unexplored.

Getting to see Zari come into her own with the totem is fulfilling, given that she’s this season’s strongest and most emotionally-invested character. Constantine brings the wisecracks and the magical abilities, which the two of them use to fight off the likes of Black Caesar, Bonnie & Clyde, and Henry VIII. There’s also a surprise romantic aspect to things – although it may have been just a brief tease, we have to admit that Zari 2.0 and Constantine make a MUCH more interesting couple than she and Nate.

However, while it’s a great concept, it does seem to meander – much like the episode as a whole. We as an audience know that eventually they’ll find the ring, which means it’s not a matter of if, but how, and unfortunately for the show – the how just isn’t as entertaining as they’d hoped. Even with so many fun characters the story just winds itself in circles and we never feel like the characters are in a rush – if there were a ticking clock, perhaps, it might’ve worked a little better.

If the ‘A’ story is meandering, the ‘B’ story is almost entirely pointless. In our eyes it has very little going for it already – its three characters are Ava, Gary, and Mick, all of whom are fun in a group setting but not great when left to their own devices. To make matters worse is that while Ava seems VERY determined to speak with Astra, the purpose of the mission isn’t entirely clear, and because we know that the ring is with Zari and Constantine, we have no reason to be invested in the goings-on of hell.

It seems like the only meaningful takeaway was Astra’s addition to the Waverider at the end of the episode, but given just how loose the show is with its own rules, it easily could’ve found a more interesting way to get her there as opposed to having Ava and Gary bumble around hell for half an hour.

We were so excited going into last night’s episode because of how high the stakes were from last week, but Legends completely dropped the ball when it came to momentum. Though Tala Ashe and Matt Ryan are certainly highlights, “The Great British Fake Off” falls flat at a crucial point in the season.

What did you think of this week’s episode? Who do you think should be brought back with the Loom first? Sound off in the comments below.